First of all, if you’re recently engaged and reading this – Congratulations! This is going to be such an exciting time in your life as you prepare to spend forever with the one whom your soul loves. Your wedding day is the day that you’ve been waiting for since you were little playing wedding with a white princess play-gown and a pillowcase veil hanging from the back of your head. Let me tell you, wedding planning is the most fun experience. I mean, why else would I love getting to do it for a living?
Trust me, I totally get it. You’ve dreamed about this day for as long as you can remember and can’t imagine anyone but yourself planning it. You want to make the decisions, and you want it to go your way. I’ll be honest, I was the same way when I planned my own wedding. Many brides, whether it be for financial reasons or their love for everything Pinterest taught them about DIY, decide to plan their own weddings.
While planning your own wedding is not a bad thing, it’s no simple feat. So, if you’re deciding to plan your own wedding without a full service wedding planner, I’ve got some advice for you.
My Advice For the Bride Planning Her Own Wedding
Wedding Planning is NOT a Prescription For Stress
It’s no secret that planning your wedding is like a full time job in itself. Not to mention, today’s brides are only getting busier and busier. However, many brides think getting engaged is a prescription for a stressful time to come. But, it doesn’t have to be stressful! Wedding planning is one of those things that is what you make it to be. You don’t have to let planning a wedding consume your whole life. Make yourself a timeline, and do a little at a time.
You Can’t Make Everyone Happy
It’s that simple. Everyone has an opinion, and you can’t try to schedule things around everyone else’s schedules. Frankly, you just won’t get anything done this way. What is most important is that you do what is best for you and your fiance. It’s YOUR big day, not Aunt Sue’s!
Create a Budget (and Stick with it!)
Budget is like the awful four letter word of wedding planning. It’s the thing that everyone needs to have but no one wants to play with. Your wedding budget should be one of the first, if not the first, conversations that you have after you decide it’s time to start planning your wedding. But remember, bigger doesn’t always mean better! Be smart, do your research, and don’t get sucked in by the hidden costs of planning your wedding.
Don’t DIY Everything
Brides are getting busier and busier between their careers, going to school, and everything else life has to bring. I tell every bride-to-be the same thing. No matter how much you think you can do it all, you probably can’t. If you do, you’re bound to be stressed out and forget to enjoy your own engagement.
I’ll be honest, I was one of those brides. I was convinced that I was able to do it all. However, as the queen of crafts and DIY, I think this was the hardest thing for me to admit to myself. If I could go back and slap bride-to-be me with any piece of advice it would be this:
It’s okay to have help.
Get your family or your bridal party involved! Turn your living room DIY session into a wine and tapas night with your girls. Not only will you be getting stuff done, you’ll be having fun rather than crying alone from stress. (Don’t tell me I’m not accurate!) Plus, you’ll have a fun memory with your friends to look back on.
It’s Okay if He Isn’t as Interested In Helping
A lot of brides get frustrated because their fiance isn’t as interested in helping with the wedding planning. Did you notice how I started that sentence? That means you’re not alone! You know what else? It’s okay! Just because your fiance is not interested in linen colors, floral arrangements, and stationary doesn’t mean that your future together is doomed. Just remember that guys haven’t exactly been dreaming about the wedding day like we have our whole lives.
Hire Day-of Support
To be honest, it’s a mistake to not hire a full-service wedding planner for your wedding. In fact, 96.5% of couples that don’t hire a wedding planner actually wish they would have. Unfortunately, by that time, it’s already too late. However, I totally get that you may want to plan it yourself. But, like I tell all my brides, it’s impossible to both direct and star in your big day. My advice? At least save room in your budget for a day-of coordinator. It’s perfectly okay to have professional help on the day-of. In fact, you’ll have a much better wedding day experience if you do! Thats why most wedding planners, like myself, offer day-of coordination packages in addition to our full-service packages.
I can confidently say that my wedding would not have gone so smoothly without my day-of coordinator. (and I plan weddings for a living!)
You want to be able to enjoy your wedding day, right? While being the whip that makes sure your vendors are in shape when it comes to coordinating on the day of the wedding, wedding planners also make sure your bridal party sticks to the schedule so you don’t have to track down your eleven bridesmaids that you’re totally regretting by the day-of. They make sure that everyone is exactly where they are suppose to be, and helps the night progress like a well oiled machine so that you’re not wondering how exactly you ran out of time for the bouquet and garter tosses before your DJ packs up and leaves.
Not to mention, who wants to be on the phone coordinating with vendors arriving while they’re trying to get their hair and make-up done? Who wants to be worried about making sure the reception goes on schedule while they’re dancing the night away with their friends? I guess in a way wedding planners could also be known as a sheep herder. Read more about why you should hire a wedding planner, here.
If you only take one piece of advice away from this blog post, I hope it’s this one. Please, oh please, sweet baby Jesus. Just listen to me.
Keep Your Priorities Straight
Forgetting what’s really important is the biggest mistake that could be made when planning your wedding. (Read more about the biggest wedding planning mistakes you’ll make, here.) Too many times brides get caught up in all the wedding planning. They forget what this season of their life is truly about: marrying the one whom their whole being loves! When you’re getting stressed over smaller details, remember that this all wouldn’t be happening without that special person. Your engagement is a happy journey for you to take together. Don’t let it be spoiled by things that don’t truly matter in the end!
Regardless of how your wedding planning journey goes, the most important thing is that you enjoy the journey and keep sight on what the whole journey is about. Remember the reason why you’re planning this wedding in the first place – you’re getting married!