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A Hosting Home

Styling and Inspiration + Handcrafted Designs

Coffee with Cathy

What We Learned Our First Year of Marriage

We’ve been married for one year!

If you’ve had the chance of reading about our story you’d know that, technically, we were married for one year back in April because we eloped before our big wedding. Nevertheless, it’s been a big year for us! We moved across the country for Rob’s career, I’ve been hustling hard with my business, and we’ve been making plans for the future of our little family. To be honest, I feel even more like an old married couple than we already are. At least my overgrown toddler of a pup keeps me young!

This is a different kind of blog post.

Not different in any way other than that Rob wrote this blog post with me! It was the classic end of an evening with pillow talk. We realized that we had started dating that day three years ago. And as embarrassing as it may sound, we were looking back at all our old Facebook photos together! We both couldn’t believe how much we had changed over the past 3 years, both physically and mentally. We dated during year one, we were engaged during year two, and married during year three. That’s a lot of change in a few years! As we were both drifting off to sleep I found myself asking the big question.

“So, what have you learned our first year of marriage?”

I’m not afraid to say that I learned a lot over the course of my relationship with Rob. Not only have I learned about him and this thing we call love, I have learned a lot about myself. I’m confident enough to say that I am a much stronger woman than I use to be, and I wouldn’t be where I am today without him. He’s taught me that I could no longer float and tiptoe around in life in order to go unnoticed. My feet must rest squarely in the area in which I reside, look people in the eye, and own the space I occupy. Because if I don’t believe I belong, I never actually will.

Inn at Quarry Ridge Wedding // Atlanta Wedding Planner // Atlanta Wedding Coordinator

Kati Hewitt Phography

Marriage is work.

I don’t mean to say that to scare you out of marrying the man of your dreams. Work isn’t always a bad thing. I can confidently say that even great marriages are work. I mean, it had to get great somehow, right? You’re working together towards the common goal of your forever together. Naturally you’ll have differences of opinion or grumpy attitudes some days when your significant other eats all your chocolate. (True story. He now labels it so I don’t touch it!)

The sad reality is that if marriage was really that easy, there wouldn’t be so many broken families in this world. A wise woman once told me that it takes a lot more than just love to make a marriage work. It’s all the things that stem from your love working together. Kanye’s lyrics will start to take on a new meaning, and what doesn’t kill you truly does make you stronger. Together.

(or Kelly Clarkson. She sings pretty much the same lyrics, right?)

It goes by fast.

If you think your wedding day will fly by in a blur, try marriage. It honestly feels like we got married just yesterday. When I think in terms of the past year, I often go back way further. It just doesn’t seem possible that time has flown by that fast. As if moving twice, hustling in a business, and everything else that comes with a new marriage wasn’t enough.

One of the things I cherish most are the photos that we have together. They’re some of my favorite things in the whole world. Not only do photographs capture memories, they capture the emotions. While I overflowed my iPhone with experiences and photos of the little things, my biggest regret is not taking more photos of us over this past year. I can only hope that I take the time to actually print the ones I do have. I feel like before I know it, another year will have gone by.

It’s a lot of giving, less taking.

When they say that marriage is a lot of give and take, it’s actually a lot more giving than taking. I don’t mean it in the sense that you’ll be begrudgingly putting your spouse first in everything. What I mean is that your decisions aren’t impacting just you anymore. It’s about putting your spouse first in everything. It’s about putting your spouse first because you genuinely care about their feelings and input. You’ll find yourself asking, “How would ___ feel about this?” before even minor decisions that you make. You’ll be putting their needs and wants before your own.

For example, there’s a good portion of the population who things it’s strange that I ask my husband for permission for just about everything. I don’t ask permission because I have to. I’m not a suppressed woman caught in a power struggle. In fact, nine times out of ten, he sarcastically answers me by saying that he doesn’t care or asking why I’m even asking in the first place. But rather, I ask because I care about what Rob thinks, and he does the same to me.

Dating is still just as important. 

I’ve preached this before, and I will always continue to do so. Dating does not stop at the wedding day. Nevertheless, it’s actually more important after you’re married. You’re living together, you’re spending all your waking moments together, and you may feel like ‘everyday is a date day.’ In reality, you get caught in the routine of life, the trap that a busy schedule equates to success, and chasing time that isn’t there.

Time is a precious commodity in the world. Making time to date your spouse in a season of life that shows no signs of slowing down is saying “You are important. You are worth my time.” 

Lastly, in the words of Rob, “No one really cares if you leave the toilet seat up.”

While he may think that no one really cares, they do. In actuality, I’ve learned it’s more about picking your battles when it comes to your marriage. It’s about asking yourself what really matters in the grand scheme of things. Is it really worth picking a fight over? Sometimes it is. Fighting can be healthy. But, chances are the little things aren’t a question of your spouse’s character. Leaving the toilet seat up doesn’t mean Rob is an awful person – it means that men are just dorks! Save the fighting for battles that need to be fought. Hopefully, there won’t be too many of those.

June 23, 2017

« What Your Wedding Guests {Really} Care About
Live Painting is the New Wedding Trend You’re Going to Love »

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Atlanta based Award Winning Interior and Event Designer and Home Blogger Cathy Nugent

Hi, friends! I'm Cathy, a nationally published award winning designer of spaces to gather and southern belle writer based out of a small(ish) town outside of Atlanta, Georgia. However, most people know me as the Monica Geller of my friend group – a coffee connoisseur and dog mom with a huge heart for hosting and an eye for design. The heart behind what I do is simple. I want to help you be intentional on creating spaces to gather and celebrating life's precious moments - whether that be weddings, parties, or something as simple as having loved ones in your home. Living Simply, Loving Generously, and Hosting with Heart.

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I’m not going to mind doing dishes with a pretty I’m not going to mind doing dishes with a pretty view like this. ✨💛 I hung these DARLING cafe curtains in my kitchen today, and I can’t get enough of the gold details with the rod, rings, and medallions. I still need to install cabinet hardware, but I’m really loving how everything is coming together in our new house. I’m feeling so inspired with embracing new styles and I hope you are too following along!  #ahostinghome 

Shared a closer look on stories today! Shop via @shop.ltk ➡️ https://liketk.it/3Futt #liketkit #shopltk #ltkhome

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#interiordesign #homedecor #homedesign #kitchendesign #kitchen #whitekitchen #whitekitchencabinets #traditionalhome #traditionalhomedecor #modernfarmhouse #modernfarmhousestyle #modernfarmhousekitchen #modernfarmhousedecor #modernfarmhousedesign #transitionaldesign #transitionaldecor #transitionalstyle #interiordesignstyles #bhg #bhghome #bhgstyle #bhgstylemaker #bhglivebetter
Building raised garden beds and planting with a to Building raised garden beds and planting with a toddler who just wanted to  dig and bury tools and throw dirt everywhere was as about as chaotic as you could imagine. (Forget wood for a second, have you seen how expensive DIRT is this year?! 🤦🏼‍♀️) Rob built me raised beds at our old house after Layne passed away and learning to garden became such a labor of love for me. We really missed having a garden last summer after we sold our old house and moved into the rental, so we were so excited to get started and plan another set of raised beds for this year for the new house. It’s a start — and we can’t wait to expand this little garden area even more as we go. 💛🪴 Are you excited for your garden this year? What are you growing?! #ahostinghome 

#raisedbeds #raisedgardenbeds #raisedbedgarden #raisedgarden #raisedbedgardening #gardening #backyardgarden #bhghome #mybhg #bhglivebetter
Can I just say that if you’ve been on the fence Can I just say that if you’ve been on the fence about a bold design decision… to just do it! After I shared the black living room wall, I had a few friends tell me they wanted to do the same in other spaces in their home and they chickened out. Especially when it comes to paint, I say just go for it! Paint is one of the easiest ways to completely transform the look and feel of your home. It’s only paint — and that’s the beauty of it! If you hate it you can always paint it back. So instead of asking what if you hate it, ask yourself what if you LOVE it?! 🖤👏🏼 #ahostinghome 

// shop via @shop.ltk ➡️ https://liketk.it/3EXef

// Color Details: Tricorn Black by @sherwinwilliams mixed in eggshell/satin in the Duration line // Walls are Extra White by #sherwinwilliamspaint 

#tricornblack #sherwinwilliams #sherwinwilliamstricornblack #sherwinwilliamsextrawhite #blackaccentwall #blackwall #accentwall #interiordesign #interiordesigner #interiordesignideas #homedecor #homedesign #homedesignideas #traditionalhome #traditionalhomedecor #transitionaldesign #homestyling #transitionaldecor #transitionalstyle #bhg #bhghome #bhgstyle #bhgstylemaker #bhglivebetter #mybhg #bhgcolor #swcolorlove
About the only thing I managed to get done this we About the only thing I managed to get done this weekend with a sick toddler was the little gallery wall in our dining room. I found these wireless battery operated gold gallery lights on Amazon and they are AMAZING. Comes in 3 colors, under $35, and super easy to install. I love how it just added a little something and made it look more high end. 😍👏🏼 #ahostinghome 

// shop via @shop.ltk here ➡️ https://liketk.it/3Ep2B

tags // #homedecor #homedesign #interiordesign #gallerywall #traditionalhome #traditionalhomedecor #transitionaldesign #transitionalstyle #transitionaldecor #diningroom #diningroomdecor #diningroomdesign #ltkhome #bhg #bhghome #bhgstyle #bhgstylemaker #bhglivebetter
My living room took a complete transformation this My living room took a complete transformation this evening — and I’m so in love! (You really didn’t think I’d part with these floral curtains did you?! 🤪) I always talk about the power of paint… but there’s also so much power in drapery, friends! I love how cozy they make our new home feel and how it just feels like “us” now with them up. ❤️ #ahostinghome
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#interiordesign #interiordesignideas #interiorstyling #livingroomdecor #livingroom #traditionaldecor #transitionaldesign #transitionaldecor #transitionalstyle #traditionalhome #homedecor #homedesign #floralcurtains #livingroominspiration #livingroomideas #modernfarmhouse #modernfarmhousestyle #modernfarmhousedecor #bhghome #bhgstyle #bhgstylemaker #bhg
✨ Progress ✨ I’m so excited to finally be at ✨ Progress ✨ I’m so excited to finally be at the point of unpacking that I can start decorating a little bit! What do you think of the vibe in here so far? Hoping to get the kitchen cabinet hardware on this weekend! #ahostinghome 

p.s. I’ve also got big plans to refinish these table and chairs soon! 😍

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#interiordesign #homedecor #homedesign #kitchendesign #kitchen #whitekitchen #whitekitchencabinets #traditionalhome #traditionalhomedecor #modernfarmhouse #modernfarmhousestyle #modernfarmhousekitchen #modernfarmhousedecor #modernfarmhousedesign #transitionaldesign #transitionaldecor #transitionalstyle #interiordesignstyles
After all the rain, we finally got the wire backin After all the rain, we finally got the wire backing, our gates done, and the fence finished this week! 😍 We had a fencing company local to us do it, and they did an amazing job. We had a fence like this at our old house, and we loved how open it made our back yard feel while still keeping the dogs in. With the dogs, the fence was project priority No. 1 after we moved in — and I must say, I’m so glad I won’t have to embarrass myself chasing a puppy around the house with a toddler on my hip in my slippers anymore! 🤪 Are you team privacy fence or team 5 row fence? 🏡 #ahostinghome
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#farmhousefence #blackfence #fiverowfence #5rowfence #blackfarmhousefence #farmfence #modernfarmhouseexterior #modernfarmhousebuild #farmhouseexterior #farmhousebuild #houseexterior #homeexterior #whiteandblackhouse #blackandwhitehouse #blackandwhitehome #homedecor #homedesign #georgiahomes #exteriordesign #exteriorpainting #exteriorpaint
It’s been a long time coming, y’all… We clo It’s been a long time coming, y’all… 
We closed on our new house last week! It has been a crazy past few days getting moved in and the essentials set up/ unpacked, but we are so excited for the new adventure! We’ve already got so many plans and ideas, and I can’t wait to completely transform this home! 😍 I hope you’re just as excited to follow along! #ahostinghome
The power of paint (and shutters!) Adding black sh The power of paint (and shutters!) Adding black shutters and a black door completely transformed the look of our house and made the exterior POP! 😍 We’re getting SO close, y’all. We’ve got just a little finish work left inside for them to wrap up, and we have our final walk through next week! #ahostinghome 

Exterior Paint Colors—
- Siding: Extra White by @sherwinwilliams 
- Shutters & Door: Iron Ore by #sherwinwilliams 
- Cedar wood columns

#newbuild #newbuildhome #newbuildjourney #newbuildprogress #newhomeconstruction #newhome #houseprogress #homeprogress #extrawhitesherwinwilliams #ironoresherwinwilliams

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